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User Created Poll
how are you like while you're with you're significant other's family?
shy
50%
dislike them
4%
comfortable
21%
talkative
14%
simply just stay away
4%
other/s
7%
Total votes: 28
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Ideal first date?
So... someone asked me to go on a date with them, but it feels strange. I've been MIA in this whole dating game for a while. Been doing things solo and just meeting with old friends and such, so this feels like it's all new all over again.
Although he seems nice, he tends to be a bit demanding wanting everything the way that he imagines it to be. And to put this in context, we haven't seen or met before, it's more like a blind date we set for ourselves. I just feel pressured to do what he wishes and it makes me nervous. Shouldn't a first date be somewhat nerve wrecking but also something that I can feel at ease and comfortable to also attend?
Yes Mister, if you are reading this, I really do feel uncomfortable because you're so pushy, you say you want things simple, but when I suggest activities or what to do, you always ignore my opinions and jump right over to what you want to do all over again. It's quite uncomfortable. I'm actually afraid to actually go on the date because it wouldn't be a pleasant feeling arguing on the first date.
So, someone, anyone... give me your opinions on what an ideal first date should be like? Relaxing? Comfortable? Easygoing? Or should it be straight to the point and get down and dirty with deep secrets about one another?
I really think it should be something that should put both party at ease regardless if you know each other or not. Besides, first impression counts, not always, but it really does. And I just don't want to have a bad impression of this guy who appears to only want his way... but maybe that's just how I see it.
Comment and let me know what you all think. Thanks everyone btw.
jLuv3r
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June 12, 2010 - 8:22pm
#2
Yes, I know. Awkward silences are bad. But in this situation, I'm afraid we're going to be constantly disagreeing. It may only seem like a fun little argument here and there, but if it's going throughout the whole entire date.... AHHHH, I'm not sure how to handle it. But thanks for the comment. 
jLuv3r
June 12, 2010 - 7:57pm
#3
having sex on the first date is a must!! haha jk. umm juz take it easy. u shouldnt be too critical on planning activities on a date. there shouldnt be any expectations. just do the usuals: go to the movie theater, go eat, chill somewhere just to talk. those are wat i usually do on dates, boring huh. but thats how its suppose to be until u become more comfortable around eachother to plan bigger and better things
June 12, 2010 - 8:23pm
#4
I actually like the whole fact of going to the movies.... but the bad part about it is... he doesn't know what to watch and I suggested a couple different ones but he doesn't even want to watch anything I suggest at all, instead he changes his mind back and forth and then at the end always ends up with one statement.
And LOL @ the sex! Haha, no way! It's too awkward. Haha.
jLuv3r
June 12, 2010 - 8:01pm
#5
If you're already uncomfortable with this guy before you two have even been on the date, maybe your instincts are telling you that you shouldn't go on a date with him.
To answer the question, I'd prefer my first dates to be relaxing, but I'd still like to be kept on my toes wondering where the date is headed next. If it gets to be too predictable then it gets boring. Good first dates should always have some element of fun.
I've been on bad first dates, but I've always seen the date through to the end even if I felt uncomfortable because of courtesy. And, I try to be as honest as possible to the other person about how I feel without hurting their feelings. I hate being led on and I wouldn't want to do that to someone else. If the date is a bad date and you just don't feel like the guy is someone you'd potentially be with, it's best to be upfront about it. Some guys take it a lot harder than other guys. I once had a guy cuss me out and flip me off only to call me back less than an hour later to ask for a second chance. Haha!
Seriously, if you're already not feeling a connection with this guy you're referring to, don't go on the date. Even if it's been ages since you've been on a date, there are plenty of fish in the sea. You don't want to put yourself in an awkward position of later telling this guy that you can't stand him to his face.
June 12, 2010 - 8:26pm
#6
I feel uncomfortable because usually guys tend to give in to a girl.. they just kind of follow whatever she wants and this guy is different, he kind of want things his way and it's very uncomfortable for me. I respect his opinions and everything but he seems to jump right over me and value his choices more. Maybe I'm being close-minded.
And yes, I will take your advices into consideration. If no connection, no point to go on the date and lead someone on because I also don't want to be led on. Thanks for giving me advice and sharing your own.
jLuv3r
June 12, 2010 - 8:42pm
#7
A good level of consideration in a guy is good. If you think he's too abrasive, then you'll no doubt clash with him. But, hey, clashing with someone isn't always a bad thing. You just have to be able to bring out the good in each other rather than the bad.
When I first met my boyfriend, he was unlike any other guy I'd dated before. I honestly thought he was too opinionated for his own good, but I soon came to realize that I liked his opinions because he was able to give me a new perspective on life.
You don't want a guy who gives in to you every time, but you don't want someone who doesn't even take your ideas into consideration. It also depends on you. If you're the type of person who likes challenges, this guy might be what the doctor ordered. Hehe.
June 12, 2010 - 8:53pm
#8
Yes I know what you mean. I'll keep you updated on how and what happens.
jLuv3r
June 12, 2010 - 10:19pm
#9
no. he sounds like a total biach. if u dont even know him well and hes already being annoying, its only gona get worse. y is he being so uptight about little things? u juz need to take charge and say wat u want and if he cant compromise then just forget the date. if he really likes u and wants to go on the date, then hell do whatever you suggest. its not like your suggesting ridiculous things, or are YOU? 
June 12, 2010 - 10:22pm
#10
Haha, no way! I'm just saying since he doesn't know what to do then why don't we just go to the movies. And he said okay, but he still doesn't know which movie to watch so I said Sex and the City 2. And he's all like nooooooo and a whole bunch of other things. It's like he doesn't know what to do but doesn't want me to suggest either.
And yes I do agree about the "if he really likes u and wants to go on the date, then hell do whatever you suggest. its not like your suggesting ridiculous things"
But... *sighs...........* I've been out of it too long, maybe it's my fault, maybe this is how it should be happening now?
jLuv3r
June 13, 2010 - 7:50pm
#11
hmm.. my first date was a cruise on a boat... dinner, fire works, & castles.. then sex... ;p - Sara
p.s. but I'd suggest u go to a movie or something normal..
June 14, 2010 - 5:14pm
#12
Thanks.
jLuv3r
For first date, it should be easy going. For me personally, I think both minds should be open to anything. So if something comes up and change of plans then it should be fine. I like the easy going dates where there's no awkward silence. Bleh those bugs me xD The guy should think twice, he should take part in what you have to say to. =)
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