I don't know why I envy you so much. Maybe it's the fact that you're getting to do more things than I am. Though you are, does it mean you have a better life than I do? I don't know. Maybe your life is just more adventurous than mine. I don't know why I have to be so evil. I just don't know, it's just how I am. I can't stand people doing better than I am. Am I a bad person for thinking this way?
I'm sorry, but I just can't take it anymore. It's time for me to change into a whole new person with a new life ahead of me. Though, you are having your adventure and fun, I'm in the Yale Institute Summer Program learning about how to prepare for college. Now tell me, what's more important and useful? I don't know why you haven't come even though you signed up and told them you would come. You said you were too busy and your schedule didn't fit. Now that I see that you have skipped, do you choose fun over important stuff? You had your dreams of becoming a photographer, becoming a chef, being an architect and interior designer, but you're out and about having fun. It's funny though because I'm the one who first wanted to become an architect, I'm the one who first wanted to become an interior designer, but you were very slow and didn't know what those were when I mentioned to you that it was what I wanted to be. But now you know what they are, you're interested in them? I find you funny, friend.
We've been friends for a little over four years, but I've never envied you until now. Why? Because ever since that little incident, your whole life changed and your life was practically you in control. You did whatever you wanted as I had to listen to my parents and couldn't do anything as much. Yes, I'm envious of you because you get to have such an adventurous summer than I do, but then again, it's fine because you know why? I'll be the one learning something important over the summer (about college preparation) and it'll come in handy. Now if you ever asked for help, I wouldn't help you unless you really needed it. I seriously thought you knew better, that's all. I've always supported you and your dreams. I wanted the best for you. Now that I've tried, even though I do envy, I do not regret because it's what a 'friend' does.
This is my confession to you. I have nothing else more to say. I've always been there for you, but you never seem to open up. Always hiding things away even though we've been friends for four years. What's up with that? I tell you everything I say and do, but now I see your true colors. When you were deep in the dumps with your boyfriend, I told you the truth of reality and you said you broke up with him. You said you did, but I wonder if you told the truth. Why? You still have the Cell Phone he bought you, you still kept his ring that he gave you. If you two did really break up, and you were the one who did the move, why do you still have the things he gave you? You and your words, they're hard to believe. Truth of reality, society is full of lies. My finals words, I know that I know better than to compete with you because your life may be full of adventure and fun, but my life is full of meaning and knowledge. Thanks to you, I've realized that.

- Leenah